Got an odd email just now

From someone I haven't talked to in a long time.

Someone who used to be a big part of my life and influenced me in many ways.

Looking back I can safely say these experiences (in the long run) taught me the kind of person I'd rather not be

fixated on money
close-minded
shallow
the list goes on

and we had a huge falling out a few years ago due to a sketchy and poorly handled situation.

I blew up.

I told them how I felt and left it at that. In the years since I haven't thought much about them

and when I do, it's through the grapevine and usually a story so ridiculous that I sigh, roll my eyes and think

thank god I don't talk to them anymore!

But I've been sitting here for the past hour or so staring at my screen

typing, typing, retyping

trying to figure out how to say what I want to say without sounding

callous
cold
and downright mean

because in the end, as it turns out

letting go is harder than I thought.