July 2019

Here's a scary thing I think about

- by Alyson Shane

You never know when yr last conversation with someone is going to be.

I have an Old Grandma so I think about that a lot.

It's why I try not to go to bed without saying "I love you"

or end a phone call without saying the same

but people fight and have disagreements and not everything can end on a positive or constructive note every single time.

People are people, after all.

Which is why it's important to say those things when you mean it

like when you feel like you could burst because you're so happy to be talking to someone, and you're sure they can hear how happy you are in the excited pitch of your voice

- or at least, you hope they do -

and you know in that moment: this is fleeting.

That these are the best days of your lives

because they're spent together.

It's hard to remember that sometimes

I think

until it isn't.

So consider this yr reminder to hug everyone you love real tight tonight.

And tell the people you love that you love them.

(I love you.)

Tags: Personal


I've been blogging a long time

- by Alyson Shane

I got my first LiveJournal or maybe Xanga back in 2003 and started writing before it was cool to use your real name on the internet.

We called ourselves dumb stuff like moon_meditation, rainbow__heartache_, planetaryattack_, and Sonic_Cry and, thinking back

we were all really into underscores for some reason.

Nowadays it's cool and almost expected that you use your real name online but back in the day we called our blogs dumb things like

The Lost Planet

Marduk The Invincible's Blog

The Lolita Chronicles

and literally just:


We used avatars to set the tone for the way we were feeling with each post. People used Disney images and anime characters and illustrations and animated gifs instead of profile pictures and would cycle through different ones depending on how they felt that day.

At the top of each post we could list a bunch of info, like:

I am...:
I hear...:
I'm feeling...: 

and you'd fill it in like so:

Title: Without You I'm Nothing
Date: 11.11.2003
Security: public
I am...: Home sweet home
I hear...: Placebo - Every You Every Me
I'm feeling...: Reflective

I miss those days when blogging was simpler and you could say whatever you wanted.

Back when the internet was young and we poured our hearts here and talked about troubles and heartbreak and didn't give a damn if

things lined up or looked good

or if yr punctuation and grammar wasperfect

because you were writing as fast as you could think, unhindered and unencumbered, and as you poured the words out of your fingertips and onto that digital page you would feel this deep sense of relief and


after hitting 'Publish'.

I miss those wild west days.

But being a blogging dinosaur isn't so bad. I've spent nearly two decades working through my bullshit and honing my craft and watching as the way people communicated online has changed

and my blog has changed me just as much as any social media network

but goddamn if I don't still miss using gifs as avatars.

Tags: Blogging


My horoscope says weird times are coming

- by Alyson Shane

It says: "the purpose of this cycle is to alter any assumptions that life will always proceed logically."

Which is spooky-true in the way that only something written to sound intentionally vague enough to sound applicable in 99.9% of cases can be.

Mercury is in retrograde, or so says my horoscope, and I should hold off from buying, doing, or planning significant things like

buying a new house

planning a wedding

launching a business

and other big-ticket life events until a planet has stopped looking like it's moving "backwards" across the night sky.

I don't believe in horoscopes, but I like reading them because they give me ideas to chew on.

Are things feeling a bit tense right now?

Should I be taking more time for self-reflection?

Is there something I should be addressing, or resolving?

What could I be doing better?

Truth is, I read these dumb horoscopes because it gives me a sense of control.

I don't believe in God or the prophets or the Flying Spaghetti Monster, but I believe in a person's ability to use tech to feel empowered and better manage their life.

Like the apps I use to track my anxiety, my steps, my period and my screen time, reading something that makes me reflective helps me not feel so helpless when plans change, or when things don't work out the way I'd hoped.

But that being said

I'm so ready for Mercury Retrograde to be over already.

Tags: Life