The AHS finale was OK

November 19, 2018 - 9:50pm - by Alyson Shane

Don't worry I'm not going to spoil it for you. Mostly I thought it could have gone deeper with some characters and kinda copped out at the end there, but that's fine. 

This is still the first season of AHS I've finished in a few seasons so that's a plus.

I just don't like gore that much. Horror that leans too much on gore feels like cheap scares and though I love a good scare I'd rather have spent the last several minutes feeling tense and stressed out before a jump scare than some big gory death scene.

Come to think of it, I've always preferred ghost stories specifically for that reason: less gore.

Plus ghosts are spooky af.

When I was a kid I could have sworn I'd seen a ghost. 

It was in our old house on Murray Avenue. We had a U-shaped stair with a big heavy mirror handing above a table on the landing. 

My mom had these weird, round portraits of a small French children hanging on either side. I thought they were fancy when I was little because they had on nice clothes, but I've seen versions in vintage stores in the years since and they always give me the willies, now.

Of course when I thought I saw the ghost I thought I saw it in the mirror. 

I was going to the bathroom in the middle of the night, walking back from my parents' bedroom

(we cut through their bedroom at night for some reason even though the bathroom had two doors - one to my parents' bedroom, and another to the hallway - I forget why we kept the hallway door closed at night, though.)

which meant standing at the landing at the top of the stairs to the main floor of the house.

It must have been a clear night with a full moon, because the hallway wall was bright. That eerie blue-white things get when it's dark and the moon is full. 

It looked odd against the other dark shadows that contrasted against the soft orange light of the nightlight my parents kept plugged into the outlet in the hallway so my brothers and I didn't fall down the stairs going to the bathroom in the dark. 

I've always been a jumpy kid but for some reason I stayed there and watched the mirror instead of scurrying back to my bedroom like I usually did. I think the downstairs hallway looked so bright. That's why I stopped.

Of course I thought I saw something move.

Some fast shadow. A bird, most likely. Or a small cloud.

Whatever it was it scared me so hard that from then on I kept my eyes glued to the hallway ahead of me when walking back from the bathroom at night. 

Maybe that's why it's always been the jump-scares, not the gory scenes, that I gravitated towards when figuring which horror movies and TV shows I want to spend my time watching.

I prefer to be stressed out and waiting for the other shoe to drop - to find out what the hell is going on - than watch someone get hurt for fun.

Which has really been AHS' go-to tactic for a few seasons, I think. Especially the ones with the terrifying clown, which I did my best to watch and finish but definitely opted out of watching them as soon as we got busy. 

Maybe I would have liked it better if there'd been more ghosts.

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Spent the day at home

August 30, 2013 - 10:19pm - by admin

which meant hanging on the couch trolling around on the computer and watching episodes of Lost on Netflix.

That show wasn't as good as I'd remembered.

Back when it was on tv I used to get together with this guy I was kinda seeing on Thursday nights and watch it together.

I loved that shit.

But then the finale happened and I was all 'wtf'.

It didn't make sense. Total bs.

It's funny how the ending can spoil an entire experience

and how that can apply to other situations as well.

Luckily there's a lot of tv out there.

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Mitch Hurwitz just made my day

June 17, 2013 - 10:05pm - by admin

lefantome

Hi, Mr. Hurwitz

I want to download/buy the song "Getaway" by Mark Cherry to use it as a ringtone, how can I have it?

MitchHurwitz

We are really working on it, actually! It's tricky because 20th doesn't really have a record label, which a lot of the other studios do, so they don't have a mechanism in place, but all of David's music is so great and I really want to get it out there.

read the rest of his awesome AMA on Reddit here

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Sometimes you just gotta do it right

June 12, 2013 - 3:16am - by admin

and by that I mean bike yr ass to almost the suburbs to try Blondie's, which is this infamous burger joint in Winnipeg. It's also been featured on You Gotta Eat Here which is how some non-prairie peeps know about it.

I'd never been there myself but I'd always heard stories about the crazy lady who runs it. It's just her in the kitchen by herself and apparently she'll scream at you and kick you out if yr a dick or you pisser off which both terrified and intrigued the shit outta me.

Luckily she has her rules posted all around the joint so you know what not to do.


The most famous(est) part of going to Blondie's besides the lady who runs it is the sheer massive size of the burgers they offer. I stayed safe with the 1/8 pound burger and even that was almost too much with a poutine.



I wish I could go back and eat this right now.





They also offer huge milkshakes which were a little too rich for my blood.

Yes that's also a pun about ice cream.



When we got there it was super packed so we had to wait a while, and as we were leaving the owner apologized to us for making us wait which kinda disappointed me since I was hoping she'd tell us to fuck off or something.

I briefly considered saying something rude back to see what would happen but then I saw her kneading this massive pile of hamburger patty in the air I decided I'd better not.

That lady could have totally kicked my ass.

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remember the tv show scrubs?

August 24, 2012 - 12:49am - by admin

with what's his name with the hair who was in garden state and fantasized about being a floating head doctor that was on in the early 2000's. I used to watch it with my friend eric when I was in highschool but you probably didn't know that.

anyway I just found out that Ted the neurotic lawyer's barbershop quartet that he has in that one episode is actually a legit barbershop quartet in real life and they went on the BBC and did a cover of a bunch of songs including some katy perry track I've never heard of.

though I think it's safe to assume their version is better.

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Today I watched some My Little Pony

March 21, 2012 - 7:28pm - by admin

because after attempting to watch some Jersey Shore last week I thought that maybe I should try my hand at understanding another 'trend' that at a glance I assume is both completely stupid and a total waste of my time and here is what I learned:

I don't get this crap, either

apparently you can't watch My Little Pony on the hasbro website which makes my eyes want to bleed, so I had to find an episode online to watch and this is what happened:

some still images and a voice-over told me about two unicorn sisters who controlled the light and the day, but the night unicorn got upset that the ponies slept during her time so she decided it would always be night and the other (good?) unicorn harnessed some jewels and trapped her in the moon. which apparently was some story being read by some pony sitting on a hill reading a book. then the intro started which was a song about magic and friends and other stuff, I have no idea, and then the pony reading a book was walking on the road and it has some really stupid My Little Pony type name and some other ponies invited her to the party some other pony with a stupid name was having in a courtyard.

then I stopped because, my god, it's terrible.



I remember the original My Little Pony show being really lame and terrible as far as children's shows go and the closest I really got to being "into" it was someone gave me a pony as a gift with a saddle that opened up so you could store stuff in her back. but it was okay that the show sucked and the toys were junk because it was a children's show that no adult in their right mind could actually find cute or cool

and I think that's my issue with this 'new' My Little Pony.

because I'm seeing My Little Pony stuff everywhere. people are posting pictures of these weird anime versions of horses all over facebook, pinterest, on twitter and don't even get me started on the My Little Pony cesspool that is tumblr and I get it if it were a bunch of tweens that were posting about this kind of stuff, but actual adults who I respect are doing it and I simply don't understand it.

My Little Pony isn't cute or cool or awesome or whatever, it's a really terrible remake of a terrible kids show that happens to look like anime now and for Christ's sake it's called My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic. that doesn't even make sense! it's these arbitrary cutsey buzzwords linked together to make you think something is zomg cute when it's just useless fluff.

and you know what
it's not Hello Kitty
it's not Keropi
it's not Chococat
it's not Batz-maru
it's not any of the list of Sanrio characters who it is socially acceptable for adults to think is cute
(and that's still depending on who you ask)
because people my age grew up with those
it's different when you grow up with a show and you're naturally inclined to like it due to nostalgia but as far as I can tell there is nothing beyond the "omg these ponies have big anime eyes" that is actually in any way appealing and
no
that doesn't make it acceptable for grown men (who I know!) to be calling themselves
"bronies"
really, guys? really?

see, adults watching Jersey Shore I can kind of understand. it's escapism. it's just people wanting to forget their dramas and shitty lives and watching other people's dramas and shitty lives and even though I don't agree that it's valuable to society in any way I can at least rationalize why it's so huge. plus at least on Jersey Shore the characters actually have sex with actual people unlike the disturbing pony-on-pony pr0n people post on tumblr.

I just can't rationalize the pony thing.

it's fluff. it's stupid, useless, annoying, fluff and there's actually less reason for us to be excited about animated ponies than Jersey Shore because at least the useless annoying characters on Jersey Shore are at least (to some extent) actual, physical people. these are just ugly, misshaped, fake-anime horses.

basically this is how I felt watching it:



I'm done.

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Today I watched some Jersey Shore

March 16, 2012 - 2:35am - by admin

and don't ask me why because I don't know. maybe it's seeing their stupid faces all over The Internet or information about them getting drunk and fighting or getting arrested for being drunk and fighting or being fat or calling someone fat or whatever. either way I watched a total of less than five minutes and I think this goes without saying

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